Throttle Therapy hits the road

Given that this is Britt Santowski's last Throttle Therapy for Black Press, she thought she’d leave you with her top 10 list for riders.

Everybody likes their top 10 lists. So, given that this is my last Throttle Therapy for Black Press, I thought I’d leave you with my own top 10.

10.When contemplating gear, consider holding a belt sander against your body at high speed. Next, think about what you want to have between you and that belt sander. Dress accordingly.

9. If you attend a motorcycle safety school, you WILL have nightmares about being caught riding without a helmet.

8.  If you’re a new rider, wait 10 years to get a second helmet. Then, you won’t have to say “No.”

7.  If you do take passengers, nothing says “I really really really hate you” more than letting your passenger wear shorts, sandals and a tank top.

6. Don’t tailgate. That passive-aggressive nonsense is okay if you’re in an 18 wheeler, your dog needs to pee, your cat’s in labour, and you’re a thousand miles away from the nearest vet. But when you are the most vulnerable traveller on the road, it’s much wiser to accept being delayed by a couple of minutes. Drop back, relax, and enjoy the ride.

5. Assume everyone else on the road is an idiot, assume they are all texting while driving, and assume they are out to get you. This will have you on your toes, always thinking of an escape plan.

4. Choose your riding buddies wisely, grasshopper. Make sure you are all either equally anal or all equally relaxed. A mis-match in riding aspirations is sure-fire way to ruin a good friendship.

3. If you’re a macho rider wanting the passenger to hang on tight because, um, it makes you feel good about yourself, kindness and honesty last longer. That quick-acceleration trick is lame. And temporary.

2. It’s okay to swear. Whatever is said inside your helmet with the visor down stays inside your helmet. Unless of course you have an intercom system. In which case, this is a top nine list for you.

1.  Wave. Dammit.

And that, my dear riding readers, is that. Keep your side stands up and the rubber side down.

Just Posted

VicPD seeks person of interest after short-term rental ransacked

Combined losses for damage and theft are over $5,000

Whitecaps favourite switches to the Island

Marcel de Jong worked to end Whitecaps contract, joining Pacific FC on the ground floor

RCMP ask for public’s help to determine cause of weekend fire

RCMP are investigating the cause of the South Island Concrete fire

UVic’s cutting-edge centre leading the way in drones and AI

Centre For Aerospace Research works with partners including Department of National Defence

VIDEO: 8 things you need to know about the 2019 B.C. budget

Surplus of $247 million with spending on children, affordability and infrastructure

Greater Victoria Wanted List for the week of Feb. 19

Greater Victoria Crime Stoppers is seeking the public’s help in locating the… Continue reading

‘Bullet missed me by an inch’: Man recounts friend’s killing at Kamloops hotel

Penticton man witnessed Summerland resident Rex Gill’s murder in Kamloops

B.C. BUDGET: Income assistance raise still leaves many below poverty line

$50 per month increase included in funding for poverty and homelessness reduction

B.C. BUDGET: Indigenous communities promised billions from gambling

Extended family caregiver pay up 75 per cent to keep kids with relatives

B.C. BUDGET: New benefit increases family tax credits up to 96 per cent

BC Child Opportunity Benefit part of province’s efforts to reduce child poverty

B.C. BUDGET: Carbon tax boosts low-income credits, electric vehicle subsidies

Homeowners can get up to $14,000 for heating, insulation upgrades

B.C. man survives heart attack thanks to Facebook

A Princeton man suffered a heart attack while at an isolated property with no cell service

B.C. man sues Maxime Bernier’s People’s Party over trademark

Satinder Dhillon filed application for trademark same day Maxime Bernier announced the new party

Most Read